Today I fucked up while sleeping in my campervan.
I had eaten a burrito or two and was dropping some absolute bombs before falling asleep. I only have about 8 hours between shifts so getting as much sleep as I can in there is pretty important.
Around 1am I was woken by the CO/Propane monitor beeping loudly which is something that is scary as hell of you've ever read about CO poisoning. Well it had a propane indicator which for the life of me I couldn't figure out, I had taken the propane system out last week.
I was crouched and had silenced the alarm when my body expelled another big wave of leftover burrito fume and as it hit the monitor it starting screaming for me to please god stop with the torture.
Realizing my problem I cracked the windows and turned the fan on only to have it go two or three more times across the night, waking me and ruining my sleep for the night.
I had a horrible smelly zombie day today and it was all due to my ass.
TL;DR: I farted all night which set off the propane alarm and kept me from sleeping.
Update: Thank you all for your beautiful stories, you should all be proud
It seems like smoking cigarettes is dying out to the point where as a non smoker, if I happen to smell somebody smoking nearby it gives me nostalgia of the 90s and 2000s back when that used to be far more common.
I've never seen anyone else ever bring this up so maybe I'm the only one.
This happened in 2015 when I was a senior in high school.
My grandfather had been diagnosed with cancer in September of 2014 and had been told that it was terminal. He had just retired and we were all really sad that he wasn’t going to be able to enjoy retirement with his wife (he remarried after my grandma). He was a goofy guy who wore pants with embroidered ducks on them and always had a magic trick to show everyone when we would visit. During his last day alive, my mother, sister and myself came over to support his wife. There were also neighbors coming in and out of the house saying their goodbyes and just consoling each other. When my grandfather passed away, we were all in the room with him and told him we loved him and that it was okay to let go.
After we left the room to give his wife some time alone, my sister, my mom and I went downstairs to join the neighbors at the dining room table. This table was able to seat about 8 people and it was full so I was standing next to my mom at the head of the table. People had brought food to snack on and someone brought a cheese plate. I did not notice this cheese plate, so I started to comment about how stinky the room was to my mom and sister. Eventually I said the words “it smells like a dead body” OUT LOUD in front of everyone. The room was silent except for my mom and sister’s attempts to conceal their laughter. I turned beet red and added “erm...dead cat” to the sentence and then abruptly left to use the bathroom and reassess my life. I know my grandpa would’ve laughed if he heard it so that makes me feel better, but I can never look any of those neighbors in the face without remember that moment 🙃.
TL:DR While standing in a house that had my recently deceased grandfather upstairs, I said “it smells like a dead body...erm dead cat” because someone brought a stinky cheese plate.
I had to throw out a healthy bit of coconut oil because I wanted to find a use for the small bouillon jar I had saved.
Can we get a frugal fails thread going? I'm glad I found this sub, have gotten a lot of mileage out of the ideas and discussion here, but y'all have to have a bunch of cautionary tales of frugality gone wrong. Please share yours!
edit: The amount of people here who WANT to smell like soup is far too high.
To explain the backstory of this, I have to go back a bit. When I was a young boy, the first time I met a pregnant women was at the business place of my father. We had a little party that day, and I remember when she entered the room there was a very strong (and unpleasant) smell. Me being a kid and meeting a pregnant woman for the first time, I assumed either that's just the way they smelt, or it was a coincidence.
As I grew up I met very few pregnant woman face to face, I had a very isolated childhood, but I did notice that smell only appeared when I was in a crowded place, and frequently I would be able to spot a pregnant woman somewhere in the crowd, or a woman with a baby.
I always assumed that the reason nobody mentioned it was because it would be rude, but as I've gotten older I realize that I have never in my life heard anyone mention it. Not even an acknowledgment of the smell. This is strange to me considering it is a VERY strong smell. Virtually any room with a pregnant woman in it has smelt like that throughout, and considering its kind of a gross smell, I can't imagine EVERYONE staying silent about it.
I brought it up to some friends recently, and they had no idea what I was talking about. This prompted me to Google it, I found nothing regarding this, many articles spoke of increased B.O but this smell is completely unique, not like B.O.
I justified it as a coincidence until just a few days ago, I was in a Starbucks staring out the window, waiting for my drink. When I smelt the smell, I turned around and in the doorway was a pregnant woman. This confirmed it for me, I now have no uncertainty that all pregnant women smell like this. But NOBODY I've spoken to can relate.
I come to you Reddit, please tell me that my super power isn't to smell when someone is pregnant. Everybody's just being polite right?
I have complained to the property manager for a few months now and they will not help.
I DO NOT want to harm the animals or any tips that entertain the idea. It's not their fault their owner won't take them out responsibly.
I would like to get back at the owner for the pain and suffering he has caused.
Edit: Thank you for all the replies and ideas.
Special thanks those trying to trick me to piss up stairs just to have it wash back down to me.
Title says it all, basically. To no surprise, I am a smoker aswell, though not as heavy as one might think, but ever since I was a child I loved just smelling the air and being around people that smoke, and it was a main reason why I started myself, though that might seem ridiculous.
Use this post to discuss whatever you want! Future dream casts, trying your stand up career, crying shenanigans about this season's robbed cinnamon bun... it all goes here. Just remember to be civil and keep opinions here and not in the speculation threads. Thank you!
Today's title is brought to you by /u/billywilly13 !